Sooo I haven't updated here in a while. Any questions? Feel free to ask them in the comments...

I'm sorry if I haven't commented on any of your journals.. lol I really don't frequent lj as much as I used to. I think the main reason is I honestly don't feel like I have much to share lately. Life's just been me looking for work, for the past 6 months. Around May I've started working at the same daycare as my mom, so that's been helping me stay afloat financially, but it's not very rewarding, fulfilling, or enjoyable.

Also, I think my brain has been realising that HP is truly coming to a close, in terms of "new material" coming out, so until 3 weeks ago, my mind has been feeling rather empty of an obsession - and it's true, I do function this way. My mind moves from obsession to obsession, depending either on me maturing, or whatever it is I love to be ending (such as Harry Potter). First it was Sailor Moon, then it was Spice Girls, then it was Nancy Drew, then Harry Potter came along and lasted 10+ years (and I hope it never truly fades away), but in that time there was also anime, which has long since faded, and so with Harry Potter ending and anime out of my mind, along came True Blood.

While people's obsession with Twilight remains a mystery to me (particularly older fans), if someone had an obsession with True Blood, I can see why. I mean, heck, Anna Paquin is an amazing actress and won an Emmy award for her role as Sookie Stackhouse, but I can never, ever see Twilight or any of its actors winning any awards... except those based on votes, such as the joke that is the Teen Choice Awards, or the MTV Movie Awards. Back to True Blood - the characters are interesting, the romance is a lot more developed and also unpredictable, and when I started reading the books on which the show is based (the Sookie Stackhouse series, aka the Southern Vampire Mysteries), I found them to be rather decently written and developed. Charlaine Harris (the author) knows she isn't writing the most groundbreaking literature out there, but she also knows how to shape a good story, and give the characters sufficient flair and development.

So yes... True Blood/Sookie Stackhouse series has become my new obsession. Rather ironic given my past bashing of vamp-obsessed Twitards (how I love this oh-so-effective term). I still hate Twitards (mind you, the term "Twitards" does not encompass ALL fans, but the brainless, cultishly-obsessed fans), but alas... I too have been sucked into a vampire romance.. but hey, there's a bit of mystery thrown in there, and I rather like it.

Lastly, I'd like to give my regards and condolences to the families of Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcet. Both extraordinary people, and as for Jackson, a true pioneer, icon, and entertainment legend. Sigh.

Every night (or, shall I say, every morning) when I lie in bed my heart squeezes tighter and the pain increases each time until the vessel is no longer sufficient and spills over in a trickle of tears. My mind and heart are locked in an endless struggle between truth and lies. I don't know how to end this. I reach out to God and know He is there yet my pain is such that I reach to Him through a thorny prison and fail to see the fragrant rose, fail to see the hope I know exists beyond my vision.

I loathe this despair. I see no spark in the eyes of the woman that gazes intently back at me in the mirror. I function but I no longer live. I want to live. And because I want to, I find a way to relax the fist around my heat long enough to fall asleep so I may go through another day. Another day of pushing aside the thorns and waiting for my battered hand to someday finally close around the silky texture of a rose.

So I guess I haven't posted a proper entry in here in a while.. lol. I don't know what to say really. I guess I'll do point form updates! rawr!

- I'm in love with Franz Ferdinand again, with their new album being full of win
- I'm also in love with James entirely.. ♥
- I'll likely move to St. Louis once we marry since... well that's where he'll be living/working.
- I've recently visited him in Indiana for the v-day weekend and it was so awesome and I miss James so much =(
- If any of you can recall when I posted a bunch of squee-filled convos with "mannerism"... yes. That's James. :P
- I'm a bit jobless and my money is running lower and lower but I'm still job hunting and trying to remain relatively hopeful.. it's tough being a recent graduate :(
- Otherwise, I'm quite happy. Things aren't perfect, but life never is, and I'm happy with where I am despite certain external circumstances.. but I do believe happiness is not something that comes to you, but a frame of mind, and something you gotta create.

Also, why is it that fat people get offended if you call them fat but it's totally okay to call someone skinny? I mean, of course there's a difference between using the word "fat" offensively or using it as a term of observation.. but I mean the truth's the truth and why get so worked up over it? I mean that's a totally random thought but I totally think it quite often.. and just as randomly. And I totally mean no offense by this question. It's just a thought.. and I see no reason for people to get angry over it cuz.. well it's rather pointless cuz it's true. Anyway...

I would also like to point out that a huge reason for me being happy with where I am in life is because, thanks to James, I can attest to the love of Christ and His goodness.. and how all things work for the good of those who love Him.. I can say I am truly blessed by His grace, and though being jobless is always rather stress-worthy, I know I trust Him ever more and in His guidance of my life.. I will follow even if it means leaving my comfort zone.. and who knows, maybe my comfort zone IS Toronto and I do need to leave at least for a while to experience more blessings beyond what I can imagine.

So.. I thank God, and I guess this concludes my rare journal post... ahaha. :)

Okay soo.. this headline caught my eye, and it absolutely disgusts me.. so first, please read the following article:

"It's Affair Game"

Like.. WTF? The state of society continues to disgust me. I mean.. sites for like... sugardaddy services.. you know, whatever, it's uh.. their... preference? But a service that promotes easy access to affairs??? And they're PISSED their ad isn't being shown? I'm frankly relieved.

This made me laugh:

"Biderman accused CTV of being "extremely hypocritical" for spurning his ad while running others for alcohol products, which he said cause more harm than Ashley Madison. Labatt Breweries is one of the advertisers during Sunday's game."

Yeah but do you see alcohol ads going, "hey, it's cool to get smashed and puke your guts and get behind the wheel of a car so you can go ruin someone's life".. NO? In fact they usually have a message about drinking responsibly. But this website is basically promoting the type of shit that DOES tear families apart.. often quite bitterly.

This is soooo upsetting to me.. :/ I friggin' hate this company. A lot. I saw their ads on TV before late at night and they pissed me off.

What are your thoughts?

I'm wondering if anyone else is able to view torrentz.com or torrentz.eu?? It seems to be inaccessible to me, so I'm wondering if the problem is solely on my end, or if they're suddenly down. I can't seem to find any related articles on the matter... so if anyone has any info on this, let me know!

EDIT: Nevermind.. it works in IE but doesn't work in Chrome for some bizarre reason. If anyone has info on THAT, let me know. XD

oh gosh. right now I'm handling the sound system at church for practice and I'm reading the Tales of Beedle the Bard but I also brought my Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them book cuz I know Dumbledore advises us to refer to it in the footnotes of his commentary.. >_>

Soooo. Yes. IF you're thinking of getting gifts, but of course I don't really expect anyone to cuz ya.. commercialism for the fail. Buuut if you really want you.... then I want you to surprise me. But I understand not knowing exactly what to get can be frustrating. But, instead of telling you things I want, I'll tell you what NOT to get me.

- no magazines
- no scarves, hats, gloves, etc. please. H&M's cheap. I'll get those myself if I need them :P
- do not get pointless decorative items that will collect dust on my shelf, though ornaments are not included in this category.
- nothing related to the Twilight series. Please.
- No toys/stuffed animals/etc. Unless it's related to Harry Potter.
- No posters


That's about it... and JUST in case you need more help...

- I like harry potter.
- I like H&M
- Books are love
- So's music and movies
- Thinkgeek.com and Shakespearesden.com are love. That is all.

So there.. things NOT to get me, and helpful vague categories and/or idea-starters. :P

ChicUrbanity (3:13:52 AM): but I love belle because she's a bookworm
ChicUrbanity (3:13:54 AM): like meeee
ChicUrbanity (3:14:04 AM): and the Beast's library.. GUH
ChicUrbanity (3:14:14 AM): I would've orgasmed the moment I Saw it if I was her
mannerism53 (3:14:18 AM): haha
mannerism53 (3:14:26 AM): my personal library will make you moist
ChicUrbanity (3:14:32 AM): ooooo?
mannerism53 (3:14:44 AM): i have.....close to 3000 books, last i counted
ChicUrbanity (3:14:48 AM): ....
ChicUrbanity (3:14:50 AM): ......
ChicUrbanity (3:15:00 AM): ............
ChicUrbanity (3:15:08 AM): <3

later..

mannerism53 (3:18:09 AM): i have first editions of most of C.S. Lewis' books
ChicUrbanity (3:18:21 AM): plz.. stop...
mannerism53 (3:18:56 AM): one of my bookcases contains only leather bound, gold leaf books
ChicUrbanity (3:19:07 AM): ....
ChicUrbanity (3:19:11 AM): STOP STOP STOP


*BREATHE* must... fight.. urges...

mannerism53 (2:37:47 AM): i wish you were a little close so i could take you out on an actual date
ChicUrbanity (2:38:03 AM): ya well, the feelin's mutual
mannerism53 (2:38:11 AM): :)
mannerism53 (2:38:34 AM): hey, if it's meant to be, things will come together as they should, n'est pas?
ChicUrbanity (2:38:42 AM): yea man
ChicUrbanity (2:38:54 AM): if God wants it, no distance stands in the way
ChicUrbanity (2:38:56 AM): ftw
mannerism53 (2:39:07 AM): for sure


....I AM IN HEAVEN... AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

UPDATE!!!

mannerism53 (2:51:17 AM): well, i don't want to get your hopes up too high, but i've definitely added Toronto to the areas where i'll be looking for jobs after i graduate. :)
ChicUrbanity (2:51:25 AM): hahahaha
ChicUrbanity (2:51:34 AM): there's plenty here :P big city
mannerism53 (2:52:07 AM): well, if you know of anyone who needs a librarian...you just let me know. :P
ChicUrbanity (2:52:16 AM): sure thing :P

....AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH if it wasn't so late I'd be dancing like a maniac and screaming right now.. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HEEEHEEHEEEEE

UPDATE AGAIN

ChicUrbanity (3:00:24 AM): since we're sorta on the subject... I've been wanting to say this for a while now but ah.. I just think you're extremely cute
mannerism53 (3:01:06 AM): awwww. :) i think you're exceptionally beautiful.
ChicUrbanity (3:01:32 AM): aww :3 soft fuzzy moment!
mannerism53 (3:02:08 AM): haha. :)


*giggles*

ONE MORE UPDATE.. geez..


ChicUrbanity (3:05:05 AM): cuz.. ya.. extremely shy
mannerism53 (3:06:11 AM): haha. no worries about that. i'll charm the shy right out of you. *waves wand*
ChicUrbanity (3:06:26 AM): which wand? :P
ChicUrbanity (3:07:05 AM): (plz note: I may often crack ah... improper humour)
mannerism53 (3:07:19 AM): haha.
mannerism53 (3:07:20 AM): oh.
mannerism53 (3:07:24 AM): i do that.
ChicUrbanity (3:07:27 AM): LOL
mannerism53 (3:07:29 AM): a lot.
mannerism53 (3:07:32 AM): <.<
mannerism53 (3:07:33 AM): >.>
ChicUrbanity (3:07:36 AM): HAHAHA
mannerism53 (3:07:37 AM): more than i should.
ChicUrbanity (3:07:40 AM): ya
ChicUrbanity (3:07:41 AM): me too
mannerism53 (3:08:40 AM): haha. i made a bunch of people uncomfortable tonight because we were playing Risk and everyone was yelling and i yelled "just roll the dice, muthaf***ah!"
mannerism53 (3:08:48 AM): as a joke.
ChicUrbanity (3:08:50 AM): LOOL
mannerism53 (3:08:58 AM): and everyone got REALLY quiet
ChicUrbanity (3:09:01 AM): LOOOOOL
ChicUrbanity (3:09:06 AM): I'd be on the floor laughing
mannerism53 (3:09:12 AM): and i was like....crap.....Christians.....

Last night I had a most peculiar dream... I was younger in my dream... maybe 12 or something, and I was being kept in some type of high-rise building by these... people. Like sorta like scientists, and there were other people with me in the building, and I can remember being observed. I was also unable to escape due to the observance. Almost like "1984"? Haha. Anyway, and there was a building beside the building I was in, which the scientist people worked in. It was very high, and the outside was all glass. I don't remember most of the dream, unfortunately, but it was definitely nightmare-ish.

I remember one part where I was trying to escape and I was running around the building being chased, and I ended up in the basement eventually and was desperate to get out, so I pushed open this really small window that I could barely get through, and when I pushed my head out first, I found my head within a small area dominated by spider webs and spiders and I was so scared I actually ducked back inside (haha Ron-moment anyone? XD).

I can't remember what happened after that, but I do remember the last part of my dream. The scientists led me out of the building I was in and we went out a certain distance then they turned me around to face the glass building. They said something to me that I can't remember, then they took me into the glass building and we went up the elevator to the rooftop.

There, they said some more things to me, but the part I remember most was when I looked at them in nervousness and they said, "There is no love. There is no joy. Everything is a lie, do you understand this?", or something to that effect. And I remember I either started crying or felt like crying and I told them they were wrong and they kept insisting that I would understand and it was horrifying. They were so calm and it was almost monstrous. They released me then and I could wander anywhere I wanted to but I remember feeling so worn and troubled... it was peculiar.

If there is one thing to be said that can explain the apparent popularity of Sarah Palin and the apparent faith that people have in her possibly leading the country of the United States, it might perhaps be answered by that one episode of Family Guy in wchihc Lois makes a go at trying to run for the position of Mayor of New Cohog.

I mean I’m no political expert but based on the few real quotes from her (I am aware of fake quotes that have been circulating and thus ignore them), and some of the actual interview clips, it boggles my mind that anyone could consider her as remotely ready for the position. I mean people pick on Obama for being so “young” and “inexperienced” but when put in perspective with Palin it’s a little bit of a joke.

I’m sure some of you may have noticed the clips I’ve been posting from Saturday Night Live, of Tina Fey’s parody of Palin, and the scary thing is that MANY of the “jokes” in the skit are not actually jokes, but pretty much verbatim repetitions of actual responses that Palin provided in her interviews and whatnot.

I’m almost experiencing a flashback to Miss Teen South Carolina… anyone else feel that way?

I just have the slight feeling that although McCain chose Palin for obvious strategic political reasons, she’ll somehow be the downfall of his campaign. But who knows… I may end up eating my own words, so we’ll see.

In Canadian news… I have no idea who I’ll vote for. It’s like trying to choose between evils and having to choose the lesser evil. I mean I guess politics is ALWAYS about choosing the lesser evil but ah… I don’t know. The weakness of the Liberals and my general dislike of the Conservatives leaves me with two voting directions for which I feel little enthusiasm.

Okay, so I meant to post this earlier, about the Subway incident, but I forgot. So anyway, I was on the Subway with my mom and she was sleeping, and I was listening to my iPod. I saw this really really cute man sitting a bit further down the subway car, and I kept looking at him hoping he'd look my way (he didn't... sigh.. they never do), and then suddenly his stop comes along and he gets up to prepare before the subway's even in the station, and as he does so, my iPod shuffles to "At Last" by Etta James, and I ALMOST burst into snickers. I snorted and had to suppress the laugh and control my face... it was HILARIOUS. The timing couldn't have been better. If you don't know the song, just go google the lyrics and you'll see why it's so funny.

And lastly, I have been scared of not being able to buy Downy's Wrinkle Releaser cuz I wasn't sure if it was still sold in Canada... I couldn't find it in the Shopper's Drug Mart and some other place that I checked. So I went into the Wal-Mart near my workplace unsure of whether I'd be able to find it. And I went to the Travel/Trial section and scanned the area. I ended up picking out 2 mini bottles of DEET-infused bug repellent lotion, and 3 mini bottles of nice-smelling body wash, 2 travel-sized packages of band-aids, 1 bottle of foaming hand sanitizer.. and then suddenly on the very bottom shelf I see a random travel-sized spray bottle placed in an area where it shouldn't be (so many travel products end up like that)... and I bend down and 'lo! it's the REMAINING bottle of Wrinkle-Release spray from Downy (for the cruise). I could NOT believe my luck. I plan on checking a different wal-mart to find another one if possible, since one bottle seems small for all the clothes I'll have.

But yes.. the evilness that is Wal-Mart saved my lack-of-irons worry. Haha.

So the cruise is in 1.5 months.. I'm insanely excited. Probably just as excited as I was for Prophecy. Possibly a bit more, because it's a CRUISE!

Well, since I haven't posted in here in quite a while, I just wanted to post about.. well, the cruise. XD

I'm pretty sure by the time the day rolls by when I have to depart, y'all will be sick of me babbling excitedly but guess what? I don't care! :D:D

So anyway, yesterday I finally was able to purchase a LightWedge (cost me a bit though), a Frommer's guide to Cancun, Cozumel, and the Yucatan Peninsula (comes with an Appendix of "survival spanish"), a waterproof case to hold my money and credit cards and whatnot while swimming on shore (if there's no one to watch our stuff), and a lint brush that also has a built-in comb, mirror, and a little secret pocket where there are emergency sewing materials.

I'm such a dork! XD This is like, me in full-blown Hermione-mode.

Oh, and since Sunday I've literally spent anywhere from 30-40 minutes working out, every day. Tighter muscles, here I come!

My mom painted 2 wooden mailboxes. One went missing like 1-2 years ago or so, possibly longer, around the spring/summer time.

It looks exactly like the 3 shots in THIS ALBUM, but the door has a small sign that says "98". She didn't want that box to go on sale, but seems someone stole it or something. :( cuz it was in our garage back then and I guess we left the garage open one time or something and someone took it.

If you've seen it, or if someone sold it to you, plz let me know by emailing me at rachelle.kt@gmail.com

Thanks!

Poll #1243647 progreso
This poll is closed.
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All

Which trip should I consider at Progreso, Mexico?

Please note:

Horseback trip +beach = 3.5 hours = 97 dollars (US)
Mayan ruins + beach = 5 hours = 75 dollars (US)

...please help me decide, post your opinion.. I have noooo clue what to choose. :(

And before you say, "oh but you can do horseback riding in canada"....YA, but not in the settings and to the places of Progreso... so no, you can't do that in Canada.

Even if I was horrified by my test, I don't think I failed my course... at WORST... who knows, but I think I should at least pass.

Soo....

I'M FREEEEEEE~~~~! Today was the final test of my University career... wheeee!

Yes, if you are currently borrowing any of my books, or if you plan to borrow books, I am now enforcing late penalties. I will give you a deadline. If I do not get the book/manga/whatever back within that time frame, the following will occur:

- If the book is not returned within what will be a VERY generous time frame (6 months max), I will require the purchase of a new copy in the edition I had owned. If this cannot be done, then cover price payment will be required. Yes, even if it's hardcover. If I buy the replacement and it turns out to be cheaper, you will be returned the remaining money, rounded to the nearest lower dollar. I consider this more than fair.

- If the book is returned in unacceptable condition (aka water damage, ripped pages, completely deformed covers or dustjackets), you will be required to compensate. If the book was in paperback, I retain full rights to request an upgrade, that is, I could very well decide I'd prefer to own a hardback edition instead.

This is now in place to prevent future "loans" lasting multiple years. And please, if I have anything you own, let me know and I will return it on our next meeting. Or mail it if you're desperate.

By borrowing any copy of my books in the future, you agree to these terms. I will check to make sure people understand my terms the next time anyone borrows.

Thank you for choosing my Library.

;D

haha so last night I bid on a shirt that I seriously didn't think I'd win since 3 others had bid on it, but I did, and.. woot! XD I won a nice shirt from China for pretty cheap, and free shipping.. <3

shirt! :D

A very very brief... poem/descriptive narrative. lol I never know what to classify these pieces as.

Anyway.. feel free to read and review.. it's very short! XD

http://www.fictionpress.com/s/2535523/1/

Yes.. so now that I have both my plane ticket and bus registration, and will soon make certain hotel registrations in various US cities, I am getting sooooooooo excited... and STILL four months! XD Siggghh... I just hope this summer doesn't drag too much...

Anyway, PICTURESS! (I found them off flickr and claim no ownership.. I just thought they were pretty and are making me even more excited XD)

Picture 1!
Picture 2!
Picture 3!
Picture 4!
Picture 5!

And finally, I did a recording of the song "In the Arms of the Angel" (or AN angel.. whatever, it doesn't really matter).

Rachelle - In the Arms of the Angel (NOTE: you need windows media player enabled and.. try to disable any script blockers for this site in order to listen!)